I'm sick and sorely disappointed about it. It's a violation of all the rules. And that probably needs some explanation.
Two years ago, I attended PAX for the first time. And not being one to miss anything, I was sure to hit every party, panel and playtest I could. I was a flurry of movement across the convention floor. I wanted to experience everything PAX had to offer. This even continued well into the week after PAX-- when I realized that I had also picked up H1Nerd1. I considered it the cooldown for the epic awesomeness that was PAX. But I was confined to a bed for a week, and barred from work for two.
Months later, I was devouring my morning knowledge when I read that Swine Flu survivors were less likely to get the flu. What I thought was a cooldown was actually a quest. A horrible, mucus-ladden, cold-sweat-inducing quest, but it awarded the phat purp of being immune to the flu! I became a superhero, able to stop viruses in their tracks. In fact, every time I told the story about the new finding, the resulting effect became more incredible-- last week when I told this story, I informed my listener that I could now be ressurected by the mucuses-that-never-were, surrounding me like a cocoon and absorbing whatever it was that killed me. Pretty cool, I know. But I can't take the credit. I am an unwilling hero, but with great power comes great responsibilty. The responsibility of keeping up the legend by never getting sick.
So I woke up this morning with a tickle in the back of my throat. I'm hoping it goes away by tomorrow, so I can continue working on my 270-verse ballad called "Cy's Amazing Battle with Bovine Spongiform Encephalopathy and His Henchmen Prions, Which She Won and Then She Threw a Party" (working title). To affect me with even a slight tickle must mean that this is a fearsome opponent. B tells me that what I thought was a epic was a green at best. Only providing a 20% resist to rhinoviruses and orthomyxoviridae and, if the status effect is applied, a 25% reduction in effect and duration. I suspect he is just jealous of my superpowers and wants me to live a normal life, but such a thing cannot be, and I will not be convinced. The only explanation is that someone is cheating, it's a violation of the rules and I demand retribution.
He did also say, however, that eating ice cream will help heal any virus-related throat-tickles. I've decided that I do believe that and I hearby resolve to eat a pint for good measure. Just until this grevious oversight is righted.
